I took Christopher to a party today. There was howling upstairs. Found a little girl crying. Little girls being little girls- when we asked what was wrong- she sobbed that her friends did not want to play with her- they only wanted to play with her kitten.
I know this happens frequently- three is a crowd and she pretty much is always the one that is excluded. Her mommy- needed to look after the party- I know how it is- you don't have time for the drama- you just want your kid to get over it and play nicely.
And yet- who hasn't been there? Who hasn't been excluded and known the sting of rejection? I told mommy to leave me to it- and hugged the little girl to me- wondering what on earth to say. Wondering why I had no wisdom for her to try to ease her pain. Remembering my own mother trying to comfort me when I was younger.
In one particular incident- the 2 little girls next door would not play with me. My mother gave me an ice-cream and told me to go outside and eat it where they could see me. Brilliant if somewhat manipulative psychology- because then of course there was something in it for them and they did want to play with me.
I was so proud of Christopher- he gave the little girl a hug and sat playing with her. I did my ineloquent best to comfort her. What do you say? You feel for her and you want to say the perfect thing.
Funny thing is- it never stops. There will always be times where you are excluded or snubbed. But luckily, in my experience- there comes a time when you stop feeling inadequate or like there is something wrong with you and you can actually say- fuck them- their loss. Regrettably not words of wisdom I could share with this little girl.
Can you imagine...Don't worry sweetie- they are just two nasty little bitches. Fuck them- I mean really. But anyway- let's talk about something more important. I think your Barbie has had a boob-job. What do you think? And I am sure that she is on Prozac or something. I mean that smug look that is permanently plastered on her face. To be honest I think she is pretty plastic. And Ken. He's not much to look at. And his package..bwaahahahahahaa.
It is good- as you get older- you lose some things- but one of the things you gain- is the ability to not give much of a damn, to realise that some people are just down-right rude or socially inept. How do you convey 36 odd years' of the experience that got you here to a 5 year old?
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